Profanities in my Cradles

    Do you ever feel like you're living on autopilot? Like you're just going through the motions, stuck in the same routine, but deep down, something inside you is screaming for more? I’ve felt that. I still feel it sometimes—a strange tension between the life I’m living and the life I truly want. We get so comfortable with the rhythm of the world around us that we forget to question it. We forget to ask ourselves if this is really our rhythm or just the one we’ve been handed.

    For me, the song "Cradles" by Sub Urban perfectly captures that feeling—the haunting lull of routine mixed with an almost desperate urge to break free. It’s about waking up from the dream we’ve been living in and deciding to take control. And for the longest time, I didn’t realize I was asleep.

    We're almost in the last quarter of 2024 and now, I’m wide awake.

    

  Sometimes, life feels like a strange lullaby. The rhythm of everyday routines, the expectations we carry, and the unspoken rules we follow can feel like a melody that’s lulling us into a state of complacency. We go through the motions, thinking this is the only way to live. But deep down, there's that subtle tug, a faint pull in a different direction. 

   “I live inside my own world of make-believe.” That line hit me hard the first time I really listened to the song. And I realized, how often do we find ourselves doing the same? Creating this little world in our heads where we pretend everything’s okay, where we tell ourselves that we’re fine with how things are—when in reality, we feel trapped. Trapped in the expectations, trapped in routines, and even more dangerously, trapped in our own comfort zones. We let life cradle us, lulling us into this false sense of security.

    But I started to think… if I stay in that cradle too long, will I forget how to stand on my own?

   We all have this invisible boundary we’ve drawn for ourselves. It’s not one that other people necessarily see, but it’s there. It’s the space where we feel safe, where we feel known. But what happens when we realize that space is actually suffocating? What happens when the things that once gave us comfort start to feel like chains? "Cradles" doesn’t just call out that tension, it forces us to look it in the face. It’s as if the song is daring us to acknowledge the cages we’ve built for ourselves—sometimes out of fear, sometimes out of a need to fit in, and other times just because it's easier to go along with the flow.

    The line “I see the world through eyes covered in ink and bleach” reminds me of how distorted our perspective can become when we live only by what others want us to see. When you think about it, we let others color our vision of the world, filtering our dreams through their expectations. But what about my dreams? What about the things that make me feel alive, that make me feel like I’m standing in my own light, not someone else’s shadow?

    That’s when I knew—I had to break out of the cradle.

   

   It’s not easy, and it’s not about rebelling against everything. It's not about tearing everything down just for the sake of proving a point. It’s about quietly but firmly deciding which parts of life I want to nurture, and which parts I need to let go of. It’s about listening to that voice inside me that whispers “there’s more.” The part of me that craves to feel free, to be myself without apology.

   One day, during one of my usual scrolls on social media, I saw a patch of daisies in this one page. It felt like they had been there forever, but I had never truly noticed them. They weren’t showy or demanding my attention, but their simplicity was so powerful. And that’s when it hit me: daisies don’t need to be anything but daisies. They don’t try to be roses or tulips. They just grow in their own way, in their own time, without worrying about being something else.

    Be like daisies. Stand tall in your simplicity. You don’t have to be grand or perfect. You just have to bloom in your own time.

   That moment with the daisies stuck with me, like a sign from the universe. It reminded me that there’s power in being exactly who you are, and sometimes the most beautiful growth happens quietly. Just like the lyrics in "Cradles" that say “hush,” it was a reminder to quiet the noise—the noise of other people’s opinions, the noise of societal pressures, the noise in my own head that tells me I’m not enough.

   I think so much of my life has been spent trying to fit into a mold that wasn’t even mine. And it’s exhausting. "Cradles" calls out that exhaustion in its dark, hypnotic way. It’s a song that pulls you in but at the same time pushes you to wake up. The cradle is comfortable, yes, but it’s also a place of stagnation. If I stay there, I’ll never grow, never see what’s beyond the walls I’ve built.

   The song talks about “fire’s spreading all around my room,” and while that could be seen as destructive, it feels like the fire is necessary. Maybe the fire is burning away the things that no longer serve me. It’s getting rid of the old to make room for something new. And maybe that’s what I need—a fresh start, a release from the things that are holding me back. Sometimes, we need to set fire to the old version of ourselves to let the new one rise from the ashes.

   Here’s what I’m learning: life isn’t about keeping everything neat and tidy. It’s not about being perfect or about doing what others expect of you all the time. It’s about finding the courage to be unapologetically yourself. It’s about letting go of the fear of what might happen if you break out of the cradle. Yes, it might be scary. Yes, you might stumble. But wouldn’t it be worth it to know that you’re living a life that’s fully yours? One that’s not dictated by the world’s lullabies but guided by your own music?

   Maybe that’s the most important thing we can do: find our own melody. And as I continue to navigate through the noise, through the fire, through the daisy-covered paths, I’m realizing more and more that it’s not about having everything figured out. It’s about being brave enough to step out of the cradle and see what’s waiting on the other side.

   So, here’s to embracing the fire within, letting it spread, and burning away the things that keep me from being fully alive. Here's to walking through the world with the freedom of a child but the wisdom of someone who knows how to choose which cradle to rock and which one to break. And most importantly, here’s to blooming like the daisies—on my own terms, in my own time.

   Again, life is tough, so are you, fighter!